I wrote these rants (or at least, the gist of them) from two days back, some yesterday. So just putting them here, partly because someone wants me to blog, and partly 'cause I intended to, just that I didn't have a computer so I didn't save them here.

Rant #1:
Went out with Diana the day before.
Supposed to watch Max Payne at Tampines but she called to change it to the one at Downtown East. So yeah, okay, walked back to the MRT from the mall and took MRT there. Then waited till she finally came. Then she went to meet her friends whom I don't even know. It was fucking awkward.
Went to check movie timeslots and there were none suited to our schedule because I had to be back home by 11pm.
Simply put, it was a wasted trip. I could've gained a couple of RBs in that time.
And it was even more shit because I passed a lot of places that brought back a lot of.. memories. I know it sounds stupidly cliche and dumb, but it's true. It's not that those memories were unpleasant, just that given the spate of events now, it's not nice to think that any similar events cease to exist.

Anyway, this morning, she suddenly said she's not going out today. LOL?
Pissed off lah.
I feel a bit bad now for always cancelling my tuition at the last minute because I realised what respecting peoples' time means.
When people set aside a day to go out with you, and cancel the outing, it's fucking annoying because hello? Plans were to go out. I could've planned something more constructive to do.

Whatever. I can't be fucked to bother.


Rant #2:
I know the kind of "omg no one understands me boo hoo" thing is so common and usually stupid.
But lol, feels like I cannot suppress this any longer. Maybe this is another one of those immature and self-centred comments. But I don't see how any understanding or attempt to do so could have been involved, really.
No one gets that I'm not trying to lie. I've explained this to you before, and I must say I'm rather disappointed because apparently some things just don't hit you often enough.
If you don't fucking understand then stop accusing me because I honestly hate being accused. I think I am very self-defensive where comes to that. But wtf? How can you take it lying down if someone accuses you? It's blaming you for someone you didn't do, which means the innocent gets blamed. That's.. unfair. And don't start the "life is never fair" crap.

So LOL, so much for the so-called "people closest to me" lah.
It's a load of bullshit because you guys don't seem to understand a single ounce of me. So stop acting like you do plawks.


Rant #3:
Lol. Sucks because there isn't anyone I can trust enough with this. I can't, because it affects too many things. Not that I haven't screwed my life enough. It's just that sometimes, you don't go around sharing everything with everyone or anyone.
It feels like I need to spit this out, but spitting is illegal.


Rant #4:
I think the permanence of this 13th has just begun to take its toll on me. The minor emotional uproar I felt earlier was but the escalation of continuous thinking which does nothing but increase the complexity of my predicament.
Simply put, wrong means wrong, like he said. But things don't just stop there because the bitch of emotions set in to arouse self-pity and further wallowing in self-made misery. The inclination to stop this avalanche is pretty pointless and futile but inexplicably impossible to impede.
That said, I'm sorry if I've been nasty to anyone recently because life being life has been doing its job well and wearing me out.
But I just want to thank people like Cheryl for talking to me and stuff. Especially Jade because she'd been really nice to me during yesterday's incident.



:D Hehehe, I shall be happy.


And scrape my SydneyMS goals because I'm on the verge of giving up. It's so unbearably boring.